During this time my father passed away and we moved to British Columbia to be near my mother who helped us move into our 'forever home', a house perfect for our new family. Grandma would live upstairs, while Connie, Lydia and myself would live downstairs. We settled in and began to unravel the miles of red tape involved in an inter-provincial adoption.
We took the courses, filed the files, read the books, and saw the counselors. We jumped through hoops and prayed, oh how we prayed; not only us but 2 families and 4 churches stretching from sea to sea prayed for us and this little girl. Catholic, Pentecostal, Full Gospel, denomination had nothing to do with it because it was all about the love for a little girl.
In the end, we did not get her. As much as she means to us, it was not in God's will. Again I will not go into details here as to why we were denied I will not play the blame game. Those who were responsible are forgiven, no resentments. God did have a purpose though. Through our struggles inter-provincial policies were changed to prevent the pain and suffering my family went through. We still grieve for Lydia, but we have to believe that God has greater plans for her then us, and that knowledge helps us bear the heartache. Even so, looking into the bedroom we had for her still rips at my heart.
We had a week to settle into this knowledge before the next shock wave hit our little family. My mother had decided it was time to move back to Nova Scotia to be closer to her sister and mother. Our little family on the west coast was to shrink even more, from 4 to 3 to 2. God was calling her there and believe me when I say I completely understand. When God calls you to do something, even something as huge as pulling up roots and moving thousands of miles away, you cannot deny His will. So now we are helping her sell her furniture and plan her move so she can be back east by September.
A week after my mother broke the news to us we were rocked in church to find out that the lead pastor of our church was resigning. He felt God was calling him to help another church in B.C. that had it`s lead pastor retire. In his sermon he spoke of God calling not only him but all of us to "get out of the boat", get out of our comfort zones and move into ministry the way God is individually calling each of us. My wife felt the call burn into her heart. A call to change and step out of where she felt comfortable and safe.
No, she is not leaving me.
She felt we were called to visit another church farther from home. A much smaller church were we would be more needed. So a week later we found ourselves in a new church with our fleeces thrown wide looking for God's direction. And direct us He did. We felt the Holy Spirit move in that small church in a subtle but profound way. We are needed here. This is where God is calling us.
One month ago we were happy and comfortable. Expectant parents with Grandma living upstairs, a great church family lead by an amazing pastor. Life in our church was easy we could pick and choose what ministries we wanted to be apart of.
Now all of our expectations have been rocked. God has stripped away what we thought our lives would be like and offered us an invitation, an opportunity to step up and serve with abandon. Serving Him not as we like, but as we are needed.
When God moves in your life it can be in a whisper or in a roar, but one thing it will certainly mean. Your life will never be the same.